


the thing that wrecks you

by breatheforher



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2020-07-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:07:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25391365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/breatheforher/pseuds/breatheforher
Summary: Waverly and Nicole used to date until Nicole did the unthinkable and fell for Waverly's sister. Not wanting to cause a rift between the sisters Nicole left town, only to return years later.Are the feelings still there?
Relationships: Waverly Earp & Nicole Haught, Wynonna Earp/Nicole Haught
Comments: 9
Kudos: 54





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> First note. Yes, I'm starting a new fic. I'm not going to promise to update this regularly because we all know how that goes.
> 
> Second note. Yes, Champ is in this fic, but much like we can re-write all the other characters, he isn't the Champ from the show. Please don't leave me hate or walk away from this fic just because you have a dislike for him. Walk away for the same reason other people do, because the writing sucks haha. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy.

chapter one

Her suspect had fled from the bar the moment Nicole Haught had drawn her badge. He’d flung the drink he was about to consume at the redhead detective, spun and made a beeline for the exit. He was out the door and running across the road, not caring for the traffic that was swerving, screeching and honking around him and Nicole grinned.

She liked when they ran. Not always, but the majority of the time it meant they were guilty or at least were hiding something. This time, she knew that he was guilty. The fingerprints proved it. 

Nicole followed. A little more cautiously than the man she was chasing, but she couldn’t slow too much or she’d risk losing him. She hadn’t even had time to clean the brown liquid that he’d thrown at her from her face. Her eyes stung as she ran, but she didn’t slow down. 

“Police! Stop!” She called after him. 

But he didn’t stop, knowing that distance was the most important thing right now. Distance between him and the consequences for his actions. Distance between he and Nicole. 

Nicole ran, willing her legs to carry her faster. She finally had him and she wasn’t about to let him go. As they ran down a normally crowded street, Nicole was grateful that it was almost midnight and there was almost noone around. She wasn’t sure what he would do if there was an innocent bystander that he could grab. 

He turned a corner and she was there, turning the same corner only seconds later. He was only just out of her reach. She needed something, anything to get in his way and slow him down. Nicole felt a wave of relief as she spotted the eight foot tall fence at the end of the alley. She grabbed his left pant leg as he jumped and tried to climb over. The drink he threw at Nicole wasn’t his first of the night and his inebriated state meant that his balance and grip were no match for Nicole’s. She pulled and he fell, landing on his back with a thud. 

“Get off me.” He said as he tried to get up. 

Nicole pushed him back down as she knelt beside him, “Stay down.” 

She moved to turn him over when he spat in her face. “You’ve got nothing on me, bitch.” 

“I wouldn’t try that again!” Nicole looked up to see her partner walking toward them, gun aimed on the suspect. “Although, an anti-spit mask would make all the difference to your ugly face.” 

As Rosita Bustillos got closer, she pulled a handkerchief from her pocket and tossed it to Nicole, motioning with one finger that the redhead had something on her face. 

Nicole rolled her eyes as she wiped at what was now a mixture of sweat, spit and alcohol. 

“Herman Tate, you are under arrest. You have the right to remain silent.” He groaned as Nicole turned him and slipped the cuffs onto his wrists. “Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you. Now you can get up.” Nicole stood, pulling Tate to his feet with her.

The women walked Tate back to their car.

“Perfect timing, Haught.” Rosita opened the back door and Nicole gently pushed Tate’s head down as he got into the car. He’d thrown his drink on her and he’d spat on her, but she made a point of never using excessive force on a suspect. Even the ones who really deserved it. And Herman Tate really deserved it. 

Or at least his boss did. 

“What do you mean?” Nicole closed the door and walked to the passenger side. 

“Now you can take the weekend for that wedding” 

“Paperwork.” She said simply.

“There’s plenty of time for us to get it done and you to get on the road. It’s only a couple of hours drive. Besides,” Rosita paused to slide in behind the steering wheel. “Whatever isn’t done by five, I’ll finish.”

“You really want me to go that bad?” Nicole said. “You hate paperwork.”

“You really want you to go that bad.” Rosita started the car. “I’ve heard you talk about her remember?” 

“I really need to get some new friends.” 

“I am your friend. And I care. But more importantly, I’m you’re partner.”

“Why is that more important?” 

“Because it means I’ve got your back. All the time.” Rosita smiled. “Even if it means I have to do paperwork.”

“I don’t know. I don’t think it’s a good idea.” 

“Maybe not, but what’s the worst that could happen?” 

“If you have to ask, you really don’t know this family.” Nicole chuckled slightly and looked out the window. 

+++++

“You’ve got nothing on me.” He shrugged. “I told you that the last time we talked.”

The interview room was small and plain just like you’d expect. There was a rectangular table with four chairs, two on either side, in the middle of the room. Nicole and Rosita sat on one side, while Tate sat on the other. This was third time the three of them had been in this room, but it would be the last. They finally had all the evidence they needed to charge Herman Tate with four counts of murder. 

“We’ve got everything on you, Tate.” Nicole smiled, opening the folder in front of her. “Fingerprints, eyewitnesses. Your alibi from the last time we talked? Doesn’t exist.”

“You’re lying.” 

“No no. I wish I was making this whole thing up, Tate. All the awful things you did to these women.” Nicole pulled crime scene photos out and placed them on the table. 

Tate didn’t budge. He refused to look at the photos. “I don’t know any of these women. I never saw them.” 

“What about this one?” Rosita placed her finger on the top picture. “Are you sure you don’t know her?”

Tate still refused to look down. 

“I don’t know none of them. I didn’t do nothing.” 

“You never saw her at family gatherings? Or growing up?” 

Tate’s eyes went big and he dropped his head to finally look at the pictures. 

“No! Hetty!” He picked up the photo. “This isn’t real. She isn’t dead.” 

Tate looked up at Nicole and Rosita, tears welling in his eyes. He looked back down at the photo and seemed to shrink into himself right in front them. He’s shoulders fell forward and his elbows came in tight against his stomach. 

“What did Hetty do to deserve this? ” Nicole asked. 

“Nothing.” He sobbed, closing his eyes and pulling the picture against his face. “She didn’t do nothing.” 

“Then why did you do this?” 

“I didn’t! Lawyer.” He sniffed. “I want my lawyer.”

Nicole sighed. 

That was it. He said the magic L word which meant all questioning had to stop immediately. It didn’t matter though. They didn’t need a confession. They had actual hard evidence that would see Tate locked up for good. 

Nicole reached across the table, picked up the pictures and put them back inside the folder. She looked at Tate who still had the picture of his sister pressed to his face. His sobbing almost sounded real. 

She stood up and walked out of the interview room, followed by Rosita. 

“Do you think she’ll get him out?”

“Who?” Nicole asked. 

“His lawyer. Clootie is ruthless.” 

“Clootie? Constance Clootie? She’s his lawyer?” Nicole stopped and faced her partner. 

Rosita nodded, “I thought you knew.”

Nicole had never had a case of hers fall into Constance Clooties lap, but she’d heard stories. Constance Clooties was ruthless. She defended some of the most vile men to ever live and somehow she’d never lost a case. 

She was picky about her clients though. And by picky they had to be able to pay for her lavish lifestyle and Herman Tate definitely didn’t have that kind of money. 

Or maybe he did. Truth is, Nicole had thought that the crimes scenes were too spotless, too particular for someone with Tate’s IQ. He wasn’t the stupidest man Nicole had ever come across, but the crimes had shown a level of sophistication that Tate just didn’t seem to have. 

Still. They found his fingers prints, eyewitnesses picked him out of a line up. All the evidence pointed to Herman Tate. Only Nicole wasn’t so sure their case was air tight anymore. Clootie only took cases she knew she would win. There had to be something they were missing. 

“This must be bigger than him then. There is no way that Herman Tate could afford Constance Clootie. There’s gotta be someone bigger.” 

“I don’t see how. His fingerprint was at the scenes, Nicole. On the victims. The eyewitnesses all picked him.” Rosita sat in her chair as they reached their desks. 

“I know, I know.” Nicole sighed and sat in her chair, placing the file on her desk. 

“I know what you’re doing. You’re trying to get out of going.” 

“I just don’t think it’s a good idea. And now I think there’s more to this case.”

“You’ve already put in for the time off, Nicole. You’ll be back Monday. What’s the worst that could happen?” 

*****

The invitation sat securely on the passenger seat of Nicole’s car; each golden swirl weighted down with questions and memories and even though Nicole knew it was all in her head, it actually made the car feel like it was dragging under the weight. 

Maybe it was just that she wasn’t ready to go back. She’d left Purgatory for a reason and that reason hadn’t changed. Not in… two? No, three.. No, gosh, had it really been five years? 

Five years. Yes. 

That’s how long it had been since Nicole had driven any road near the small town of Purgatory, but she still knew the roads like the palm of her hand. She was sure she could make the trip safely even if she were blind and in that moment, it felt like she was. The embossed lettering on the invitation had a vice like grip on her mind and it wasn’t easing up. 

She wasn’t even sure why she’d received an invitation at all. Things hadn’t ended badly between her and Waverly, but they had ended. They’d tried to keep on touch since Nicole moved away. At first the emails were weekly, then monthly, but Nicole couldn’t actually remember the last time she’d sent or received anything from Waverly. 

Until the invitation showed up in her mailbox. 

And now she found herself driving back to Purgatory because Waverly asked for her to come. Five years had changed nothing. She still couldn’t say no to Waverly Earp. 

She did miss the life she had in Purgatory. She missed Nedley. She missed learning from him and the way he made her push herself to be a better cop. Despite their relationship ending, she did miss Waverly. There was something so comforting about being around Waverly; whether they were together or not, that made Nicole feel so safe. She missed Gus and Chrissy and Mercedes and… 

She missed Wynonna. 

She missed the way that Wynonna drove her to the brink of insanity and pulled her back in just before she fell over the edge. She missed the way her eyes squinted when she laughed. She missed drowning in the oceans of the bluest eyes that always had a touch of storm clouds. She missed her drinking buddy. She missed her best friend. She missed… 

She missed Wynonna. 

The same Wynonna that had been reluctant to welcome Nicole into the family, to let her in until she had proven herself. The same Wynonna who had threatened to beat the shit out of her if she hurt Waverly. The same Wynonna that had given Nicole a black eye when she found out that things were over between the two of them. The same Wynonna that didn’t let her explain. The same Wynonna that told her to go. 

And that was the long and short of it really. 

Nicole had loved Waverly Earp with every part of her. She’d given her her whole heart and thought that they’d live happily ever after. Right until she realised that she was in love with Wynonna and that it wasn’t fair to herself or to Waverly for them to stay together. 

And Waverly handled everything with such perfect grace. She’d cried a little, they both had, but ultimately she’d been so understanding. She hadn’t yelled or gotten angry. She hadn’t screamed at Nicole. 

“It’s better to know now than after we’re married or something.” She had whispered. 

She accepted it and moved on. And now Nicole was driving back to Purgatory to attend the wedding of  
Waverly Earp and Champ Hardy. 

Nicole hoped that Waverly was happy. She wanted nothing more for her. But, honestly, what kind of silly name was Champ? 

Nicole chuckled to herself. Surely he’d have some redeeming qualities if Waverly found him worthy enough to marry her. 

She hoped that Wynonna was happy, too. She’d written to her so many times to tell her the truth, to tell her everything, but never had the courage to hit send. It’s not like Wynonna would’ve responded. She wasn’t one for talking about her feelings. She much preferred to use her fists. This Nicole knew from experience. 

Maybe this was a mistake, Nicole thought as she drove up to the homestead. 

It looked exactly the same. She was sure that the roads she’d just driven hadn’t changed a bit either, but she honestly couldn’t remember the last sign or piece of scenery that she’d paid attention to. 

This is it, she told herself as she starred at the steering wheel. No turning back now. 

The sound of the screen door being thrown open made Nicole jump and she turned her head to see Waverly standing at the top of the stairs, smiling from ear to ear. She turned back to look at the steering and sucked in a deep breath. 

Get out of the car. 

She was barely stranding straight and hadn’t even shut the door when Waverly almost bowled her over by wrapping her arms around her neck. 

“Waverly.” Nicole smiled, sliding her arms around the shorter woman and hugging her back. 

“I’ve missed you.” Waverly said against her ear. 

“I missed you, too.” 

“Let me get a look at you.” Waverly dropped her arms and placed her hands on her hips as she took a step back. “Been watching Batwoman, aye?”

“Huh?” Nicole asked and Waverly grinned, touching the pointer finger of her right hand to her own hair. “Oh.”

Nicole ran her fingers through her hair, her thumb brushing over the closely cropped hair of her undercut. For a moment, Nicole had forgotten that driving up to the homestead just now hadn’t been coming home at the end of the day and Waverly hadn’t seen her since she’d chopped her hair off in favour of a Kate Kane/Ruby Rose style do. 

“I like it.” 

“Yeah?” 

Waverly nodded, “It suits you.” 

“Thanks.” Nicole smiled. “Happy suits you. You are happy, aren’t you?”

Way to go, Nicole. Starting out with the heavy questions. 

“I am.” Waverly nodded. “Champ is-“

“A silly name.” Nicole interrupted with a chuckle. 

“Be nice.” Waverly laughed, playfully smacking Nicole’s arm. “He’s a good man. He treats me well. He’s honestly the best.”

“Oh yeah?” Nicole smirked. 

Waverly nodded. “Second only to you, Nicole.” 

They stood in silence for a moment before Nicole looked up at the homestead. 

“I can’t believe you’re here.” 

“Honestly? I can’t believe I’m here either. I don’t think everyone is happy about it.” Nicole said, her eyes falling on Wynonna who had suddenly appeared and was starring at them from the porch, arms folded across her chest. 

Waverly turned and glanced at her sister, before turning and looking back at Nicole who was still watching Wynonna. Nicole didn’t drop her eyes until Wynonna turned and walked back into the house. 

“She’ll come around, Nicole.” Nicole looked at Waverly. “Do you still… You know what? Never mind. It’s weird.” 

Waverly turned and started to walk toward the house. 

“Waverly.” Nicole said and the brunette turned. “I don’t know.” 

Waverly smiled softly and stepped closer to Nicole. She wrapped her arm around Nicole’s back. “Come on. Gus is waiting to see you.” 

They walked up the stairs, across the porch and into the house to find Gus waiting in the kitchen. Her back was to the girls and she was busy with her eyes fixated on the vegetables in front of her. 

“Hi, Gus.” Nicole said, suddenly feeling very nervous and completely at home at the same time. 

“Hello stranger.” Gus said as she turned around to face them. “What have you done to your hair?” 

+++++

“Why is she here, Waverly?” Wynonna said, as she sat on the couch beside her sister. 

“Oh, so close.” Waverly sighed as she closed the book, her finger holding the page she was on, before placing it on her lap and looking at Wynonna. “I invited her.” 

“I thought you were over her. It’s not some attempt to get back together, right?” 

“No. Of course not. Things between Nicole and I ended a long time ago, Wynonna. Besides, I’m happy. I’m getting married remember?” 

“Yeah, but do you remember?” Waverly rolled her eyes. “It’s weird to invite your ex to your wedding. Does she even know it’s your wedding?”

“It was a wedding invitation that I sent her, so I’m sure she figured it out what with her being a detective and all.” This time it was Wynonna who rolled her eyes. Waverly watched her fall back against the couch cushions with a huff. “And OK. Maybe it’s a little weird that I invited her, but Nicole and I are friends. And she wouldn’t have come if she didn’t want to.”

“Maybe. Maybe that’s why she’s here.” Wynonna sat up. “Maybe she wants to get back together!”

“I doubt it.” Waverly scoffed. “Besides. What do you care? You don’t even like Champ, so it wouldn’t bother you if I wasn’t marrying him.”

Waverly hoped that by bringing up her fiancé the subject would change and Wynonna would forget about Nicole. At least for the moment. She’d never told her sister how Nicole felt about her. It wasn’t her place. She’d let Wynonna believe that the two had simply drifted apart. She’d spent a lot of time wishing that it was actually that simple. 

Wynonna shuddered at the mention of Champ’s name. “It’s not that I don’t like him. It’s that I… yeah, ok I don’t like him. But I don’t like anybody.”

“Well, I would really appreciate it if you could make an effort. Even if it’s only for this weekend.” Waverly smiled sweetly at Wynonna. “For me?”

“Fine.” Wynonna rolled her eyes.

“Thank you.” Waverly smiled. 

“I’ll let you get back to-" Wynonna lifted the book slightly so she could see what Waverly had been reading. “Why don’t you just watch the movie?”

“You know it?” 

“Yeah it has the Mother of Dragons in it.” Waverly arched her brow. “Game of Thrones.”

“I know what it is. I’m just surprised you do.”

“I didn’t live under a rock, babygirl. I’d like to teach that Jon Snow all the things he didn’t know.”

“Oh. Gross.” Waverly scrunched up her face and playfully slapped sister. Wynonna just laughed. 

“Must’ve been the most amicable break up in history for her to be here to see you marry someone else. She was head over heels for you.” 

Waverly sighed. She didn’t look up from her book this time. It was late and she didn’t want to keep going over this with Wynonna. 

“She was.” Waverly said simply. 

“I just don’t get it. She didn’t have eyes for anyone else.”

This time Waverly didn’t reply. What could she say? She didn’t want to lie to her sister, but it wasn’t her place to say anything. Was it? 

“Waverly? Was there someone else? You told me that you drifted apart. And now-“ Waverly could see that Wynonna was getting quite angry. She placed a hand on her sisters arm to calm her. 

“Will you keep it down? She’ll hear you.” 

After catching up with Gus, Nicole had excused herself to shower and turn in for the night. The drive had been taxing on her and she was exhausted, but Waverly couldn’t help but wonder if it was Nicole’s way of avoiding a run in with Wynonna. 

“I don’t care if she hears me.”

“She didn’t cheat, Wynonna. Nicole isn’t like that. Not everything is meant to last forever.” 

“So there wasn’t someone else?”

Waverly sighed and looked down as she closed her book. She took a moment before looking up at Wynonna. She needed a moment because she wasn’t sure what to say, she needed a moment because she wanted to tell her sister the truth but she knew she couldn’t. 

“I told him a story of two people. Two people who shouldn't have met, and who didn't like each other much when they did, but who found they were the only two people in the world who could possibly have understood each other.” Waverly said softly as she looked at her sister. 

She knew that Wynonna wouldn’t understand, not yet. But she’d read Me Before You a dozen times and that line had always stuck out to her, it had always reminded her of Wynonna and Nicole. 

They were two very different worlds; Nicole was a straight shooting police officer and Wynonna was...Wynonna. They were always going to cross paths. Nicole moving to Purgatory had guaranteed that. But they likely wouldn’t have gotten close. They wouldn’t have become friends if it wasn’t for Waverly. 

And as Waverly saw them interact, she realised that they were the same; two peas in a pod. It’s why she couldn’t be mad at Nicole. It’s why she couldn’t hold onto that life or the idea that her and Nicole would work things out and find their way back to each other. 

“What does that even mean? Who shouldn’t have met? Was there-" 

Waverly rolled her eyes. She leaned in and gave Wynonna a kiss on the cheek before standing up and heading for the stairs. “Goodnight, Wynonna.” 

Meanwhile, Nicole was laying on the bed in the spare room trying in vein to sleep. Her mind was racing. Had she made a mistake coming back? Had Waverly told Wynonna the truth? Had Wynonna figured it out? What were they talking about? Their words were muffled and she couldn’t make any of them out, but she had a feeling they were talking about her. 

Nicole rolled onto her side and slid her hand up and her pillow. She decided to try to sleep. There wasn’t anything she could do about anything right now anyway.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two

The next morning, Nicole woke with a headache.

Can you really say woke if you didn’t actually sleep? Nicole had spent the night tossing and turning and laying with her eyes closed but feeling completely aware of all of her surroundings. Was that sleep? Either way, Nicole’s head was pounding and she knew she needed coffee if she was going to get through the day.

It had been a long time since she’d slept a solid eight hours. Whether she had work or not, Nicole was up at 5am sharp. After driving to the Homestead the night before and not getting to bed until almost midnight, Nicole had hoped to sleep until at least 6am. She pressed the button on the side of her phone so she could see the time, and groaned.

She knew she wasn’t going to get back sleep, so pulled on her jeans and a t-shirt over the underwear that she’d slept in and headed for the kitchen.

The house was still pitch black and silent. Nicole rubbed her face as walked. She didn’t turn on any lights but let the moonlight and memory guide her was to the kitchen.

The buzzing of the wedding festivities hadn’t started yet, but she knew that she needed caffeine in her system before they did. And not because she wasn’t happy for Waverly. The fact that Waverly seemed happy meant that Nicole was happy for her. She just couldn’t shake the feeling that she made a mistake by coming. She should have stayed home and worked on the case.

There’s evidence and facts and she was still missing something, but she could work at it and solve it. But here, this situation with Wynonna, she couldn’t solve it. She hated avoiding her, but Nicole just wasn’t sure what to say. And she wasn’t sure that Wynonna even wanted to hear it.

“You must be Nicole.” A male voice said, startling Nicole.

“Uh,” She dropped her hands. “Yeah, I’m Nicole.”

Nicole wasn’t used to seeing men around the Homestead, unless it was Doc or Jeremy. And the man before her was certainly not either of them. Which meant he was -

“I’m Champ.” He stepped forward slightly from where he was leaning against the counter, stretched out his hand and Nicole shook it. “I’m sorry I didn’t get to meet you yesterday when you got in but I was already at the hotel. Bad luck to see the bride and all.”

He grinned and took a sip of his coffee.

“Why are you here then?” Nicole screwed up her face. “Sorry, that was rude. You’ve met before coffee Nicole.”

“I understand that.” He laughed and handed Nicole and empty mug, before point to a tuxedo that was draped over the back of one of the chairs. “I forgot my entire tux. So I messaged Waverly to leave it downstairs for me so I could grab it. There just isn’t coffee like Gus coffee, so I had to grab a cup.”

“Oh. I have missed Gus’s coffee.” Nicole grinned and walked over the where the freshly brewed pot was sitting.

“Waverly is really happy that you could come.” Champ said.

“And you?” Nicole asked, focusing on the stream of coffee and she filled her cup.

She didn’t want to look at him. She wasn’t sure what he knew or how he would react to Nicole being Waverly’s ex. While Nicole identified as a lesbian, she knew there was a stigma around anyone who identified as bisexual. She never had an issue with Waverly dating boys before her, and as long as Champ looked after her and made her happy, she didn’t care that Waverly was marrying a man.

“I know about your past with Waverly, if that’s what you mean. And I’m OK with it. We all have ex’s, Nicole.” Nicole finally looked at him. “If Waverly wants you here, who am I to stand in the way of that?”

She smiled. It seemed like Waverly had found herself a decent man to marry. His name was still silly though.

“I’ve got to get going. They’ll be up soon.” He swallowed the last bit of his coffee and rinsed his cup in the sink before setting it in the drying rack. “Just promise me one thing?”

Nicole nodded as she watched him reach for his tux. “Sure.”

“When they say the bit about speaking now or forever holding your peace? Don’t say anything.” He laughed as Nicole grinned.

“I promise.” He gave Nicole a nod before walking to the door. “Champ?”

“Yeah?” He stopped and looked at her.

“I’m not here for Waverly. I mean, I am. But I’m not. It isn’t like that anymore.” Champ smiled and nodded before slipping out into the darkness.

“So why are you here?” Wynonna’s voice came from the doorway, startling Nicole and causing her to take a bigger sip of the boiling coffee than she was prepared for.

She was sure the scalding liquid that was burning her mouth was less painful than talking to Wynonna was going to be, but she swallowed anyway.

“Waverly invited me.” Nicole said simply with a shrug. She turned to face the sink to avoid showing Wynonna how much pain that mouthful of coffee has just caused her. She poured the remaining liquid into the sink and rinsed the cup.

“You don’t think-“

“It doesn’t matter what I think. Waverly asked me to come, so I did.” Nicole interrupted, placing her cup beside Champs.

“Waverly asked you not to break her heart, but you did that.”

“Damnit, Wynonna.” Nicole brought her hands down, hard, against the sink. She hung her head and sighed. “Aren’t you ever going to let it go? Waverly has.”

“Waverly has answers that I don’t have. She knows what happened and all I have are questions.”

Nicole could feel Wynonna’s eyes burning into her. There was a time she would’ve given anything to have Wynonna stare at her, but not like this. She could feel the anger and hurt that Wynonna was feeling and she knew it was all her fault, but what could she do? It wouldn’t do any good to tell Wynonna the truth. Too much time has passed. And Nicole wasn’t even sure she still fell the same way.

“I don’t know what to tell you.” Nicole sighed.

“Just tell me the truth.” Wynonna’s voice was softer now, almost a whisper.

Wynonna was still in the doorway, leaning against the frame, with her arms folded across her chest. She was giving Nicole a look that was somewhere between puppy dog eyes and if looks could kill, and Nicole knew that she was still a goner. She knew that if Wynonna asked her again, she would give in and tell her.

There wasn’t anything Nicole Haught wouldn’t do for Wynonna Earp. Not really. She knew that Wynonna was angry at her, but she was holding back for a reason. Not only to protect her own heart because she knew Wynonna didn’t feel the same way, but Nicole knew that if she told her the truth, Wynonna would feel so guilty that she took something away from Waverly.

Four days shy of her sixth birthday, Wynonna looked at her newborn baby sister and promised her that she would protect her always. Wynonna made the same promise every year on Waverly’s birthday. Nicole had seen first hand what Waverly’s pain did to Wynonna, and she couldn’t imagine what she’d do if she thought she was responsible for it.

Everything Wynonna ever did was to protect her sister. Nicole didn’t understand that when they first met. She couldn’t understand how Wynonna’s life of crime was protecting Waverly. And, there were things she still didn’t understand, but she knew that the Earp name came with a curse and that Wynonna was determined to protect Waverly from all aspects of it.

Ward Earp, Waverly and Wynonna’s father had been an awful, greedy man. He’d take anything he wanted no matter the owner and he always promised that if you crossed him, “they’d search for you forever but noone would ever find your body.”

Ward’s father, Josiah was the same; and his father, Edwin, before him. Cruelty ran in Earp veins as far back as Wyatt Earp, and possibly before but information became harder to come by the further back you looked. That was until Waverly was born. Wynonna had sworn that she would do anything and everything to protect her little sister from the hatred and retribution the towns people sought after four generations of Earp men had wreaked havoc on their lives.

Wynonna stepped in to Ward’s shoes when he died. She had to make difficult choices and Nicole understood, more than most, what it was like to bear the weight of her father’s actions. But, Nicole could swear that when she met Wynonna, there was a part of her that loved the power and control that came with the life she led.

To this day, Nicole wasn’t sure if Wynonna had ever followed through on a threat to make someone disappear, but people feared her just as they did her father. Wynonna had a kind of power over everyone she met, including Nicole.

“There’s nothing to tell. Some things just don’t work out.” Nicole held Wynonna’s stare. She wanted so badly to look away, but she knew if she did Wynonna would take it as a confirmation of her lies.

“You’re a liar, Nicole Haught. And I can’t believe I ever considered you a friend.” Wynonna said. “The sooner you’re gone again the better.”

Nicole Haught. Nicole. In all the time they’d known each other, Wynonna had never used Nicole’s first name. Not once. It was always Haught or some pun that Wynonna always thought was funnier than it actually was. But never Nicole. And she said it with such contempt.

Nicole could feel tears pricking at the edge of her vision and closed her eyes in an effort to stop Wynonna from seeing how much her words hurt. She held her breath as Wynonna’s words cut to her very core.

When she opened her eyes the brunette was gone.

Nicole tilted her head back and looked at the ceiling. She released a pained breath and blinked away the tears. She’d forgotten how cruel Wynonna could be because it’d been so long since she’d seen it. And she’d never been on the receiving end of it. Not really. Even when Wynonna had punched her and told her to go it hadn’t felt like this.

And maybe Nicole deserved it.

Maybe this was her punishment for breaking Waverly’s heart and keeping this secret. Maybe this was her punishment for falling in love with Wynonna in the first place.

Except, once she got close to Wynonna, once she saw her softer side, once she saw who Wynonna really was, she didn’t stand a chance.

Nicole would never deny that she had loved Waverly with her whole heart. She really thought they were going to get married and have a family together. Nicole knew that she would be happy at Waverly’s side. Waverly was kind and generous and, not to sound too cliché, but she was sunshine and rainbows. That isn’t to say that Waverly didn’t have moments of sadness and self doubt. But somehow Waverly always saw the good in everything and everyone. Everything she did was to try and make the world a better place for everyone else.

And Wynonna was… well, Wynonna. And Waverly wasn’t Wynonna.

Falling for Waverly was easy. Nicole went willingly and knew what she was getting herself into. With Wynonna, Nicole didn’t even realise that it had happened until she was in too deep.

They’d disliked each other from the start. Wynonna was a criminal. She’d taken over the family business from her father and she led a life without consequences. Until Nicole had moved to town. She’d been warned not to cross the Earp Heir, but Nicole hadn’t listened. She arrested Wynonna over and over again, even though Waverly had asked her not to, but she couldn’t ever get anything to stick.

Eventually they called a truce. And the rest is history, as they say.

“ Are you OK, Nicole?” Gus’s voice brought Nicole crashing back to the present.

She looked at the older woman and hoped that it didn’t look like she’d been crying, “Yeah, just tired.”

“Well, you can have a couple more hours of sleep. There’s not that much to do for you. Wynonna is going to get the cake and Chrissy will be over to help Waverly and Jeremy get ready. Not that either of them really need help, they’re both such good looking kids..” Gus smiled. “She’s going to make a beautiful bride, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, she is.” Nicole nodded and smiled softly.

“I see that Champ came and got his tux.” Gus said as she made her way to the fridge and started to pull containers out. “That boy is so forgetful. One time, Waverly bugged me to let him help around the homestead. The pipe under the sink was leaking so I let him fix it. I didn’t want to get down on the floor anyway. He pulled it all apart put a bucket under there to catch the water and when the darn thing was full he tipped it in the sink.”

They both laughed. Nicole imagined that Gus wouldn’t have found it very amusing in the moment, but standing there in the kitchen, she laughed like it was the funniest story she’s every heard.

“Wow.”

“He’s a sweet boy though.” Gus added, placing the containers on the counter. “He treats Waverly so good.”

“I met him earlier. He seems like a good guy.”

“Oh he is. He really listens to her, and he’s so supportive.” Gus stopped and looked at Nicole. “Oh, you probably don’t want to hear any of this.”

“No, I absolutely do. I’m glad that Waverly is happy.” Nicole smiled.

“And you?”

“I am in a committed relationship with my job.” Nicole chuckled.

“But are you happy?”

“Yes.”

And she was.

She’d be lying if there weren’t nights when she craved the touch of another or the weight of someone else in her bed, but Nicole loved her job. She loved catching the bad guys and making a difference.

“Good. That’s the most important thing.” Gus smiled. “You should get some rest while you can. There won’t be a chance later.”

“Maybe I will just lay down a little longer.” Nicole said as she made her way to the door. “Unless there’s something I can help you with?”

“Absolutely not. I have this under control.” Gus said as she continued to chop and mix and chop some more. “We can’t have you too exhausted to enjoy the party later since you came all this way.”

“Are you sure?” Nicole tried again. She really was exhausted, but she’d much rather do something to help Gus and distract herself from her own thoughts than lay down with them.

“You go on and get out of my kitchen and get some rest, Nicole.” Gus said, waving her out of the kitchen.

Nicole sighed and did as she was told.

+++++

She wasn’t sure how long she’d managed to sleep for, but when Nicole woke to the sound of car doors slamming, the sun was lighting up the whole room.

Nicole got up and walked to the window. She pulled the curtain back just enough so that she could see outside, but no-one would know she was watching.

Jeremy, Waverly’s best friend was leaning into the trunk of his car. Every few seconds he stood up and handed something to the man standing next to him. Nicole wasn’t sure who it was, but from the way he was starring at Jeremy, they were either in a relationship or he very much wanted to be.

Nicole knew that stare all too well.

She knew what is was like to stare longingly at someone and imagine what it would be like to touch them or kiss them or –

Beep beep.

“Hi Wynonna.” Jeremy called, waving as Wynonna pulled in next to their car.

“Hi, boys!” Nicole watched from the window as Wynonna climbed out of her car. “Robin, Gus wants the cars parked around the back so we can take photos out the front of the homestead this afternoon. Once you guys are done and Jeremy is getting ready, I’ll show you where to park.”

“Of course.” Robin smiled.

“I can’t believe today is finally here.” Jeremy said as he closed the trunk. “Are you nervous about your speech, Wynonna?”

“I think the correct question is, have you written your speech, Wynonna?” Robin said and they all laughed.

Gosh, she has a beautiful laugh, Nicole thought.

Nicole let go of the curtain and headed for the door. She needed to make this right. She needed to move past the idea of her and Wynonna being together, and just make things right so that Wynonna didn’t hate her anymore. She knew that anything short of telling Wynonna everything wouldn’t magically make everything better. But that wasn’t an option and she had to try something.

By the time she was outside, Jeremy and Robin had vanished and it was just Wynonna. Wynonna and the wedding cake. It was a very simple wedding cake, with three tiers and very minimal buttercream on the outside. But where it lacked buttercream, it more than made up for that with different berries.

Nicole watched for a moment from the porch as Wynonna struggled under the weight of the cake, before slowly walking down the stairs and offering her help.

“I’ve got it.” Wynonna said through gritted teeth.

Nicole watched her take another strained step and knew that even if that were true, she was going to really struggle on the stairs. “Just let me help. You can barely see over it.”

Nicole took a step closer and put her hands under the opposite side of the cakeboard. She wasn’t quite prepared for how heavy it was.

“I said I’ve got it.” Wynonna repeated, but Nicole could tell that she was relieved to share the weight.

“I don’t mind helping. If we just turn this way-“ Nicole tried to step so that they would be walking sideways in an effort to avoid walking backwards up the stairs.

“No, I’ve got-“

“It’ll be easier if-

“Just let go, Nicole!” Wynonna ordered.

Even though Wynonna said it with such anger, hearing her say Nicole’s name made the hair on the back of the redheads neck stand on end. She wasn’t ready for it and she certainly wasn’t prepared for how it would make her feel.

Everything froze for a moment and Nicole just starred at Wynonna. Maybe she should tell her now and just get it over with. As Nicole opened her mouth, Wynonna attempted to take a step forward, but Nicole didn’t move. Wynonna lost her grip on the cakeboard and all they could do was watch it fall forward onto Nicole.

As cake, buttercream and berries covered Nicole, she was glad that she hadn’t put on the clothes she was wearing to the ceremony. “Shit!”

“Look what you’ve done!”

“W-what I’ve done?” Nicole could barely see through the buttercream and cake on her face. “I was just trying to help you!”

“I didn’t need your help.” Wynonna snapped, putting emphasis on the word your. “I told you that.”

“What’s wrong with my help?” Nicole asked, wiping chunks of cake from her face.

“Because it doesn’t get me anywhere. Do you remember the last time I asked you for help?”

“That was different.” Nicole said through gritted teeth.

“Yeah, it was different. That time Waverly’s life was in danger. And you-“

“I helped, Wynonna. I helped you.” Nicole couldn’t believe that Wynonna was bringing this up. She’d thought it was water under the bridge.

In the early stages of their relationship, before Nicole really knew the Earp sisters, Waverly was kidnapped. Nicole knew that Wynonna didn’t make the best choices, heck, she’d arrested her multiple times. And when Wynonna came to Nicole, in the police station, and tried to ask for help, Nicole didn’t want to listen. She didn’t even let Wynonna say anything really.

She’d told her to go before hearing why she’d needed help. Wynonna had tried, for the sake of Waverly and Nicole’s relationship, for the sake of Nicole’s job, to do things the right way, and Nicole just sent her away. It wasn’t until Gus came and told Nicole that Waverly was missing, that she found Wynonna and helped save the youngest Earp.

“Eventually.” Wynonna said. “But I learnt then that I shouldn’t rely on you.” Wynonna took one more look at the cake before walking off in a huff.

Nicole sighed as she watched Wynonna walk away, before walking inside to clean herself up.

+++++

“Is that-“

Nicole was looking at her reflection in the bathroom mirror when Waverly’s voice filled her ears. She looked at Waverly in the mirror before slowly turned to face her.

Waverly was all dressed and ready to walk down the aisle. Her sheath style wedding dress hugged close to her body and fell straight to the floor at her hips, there was almost no flare at all. There was minimal beading and lace but it as so elegant and beautiful. The white material made Waverly look like an angel.

“Wow. You look beautiful.” Nicole said, twisting a wash cloth in her hands.

“Thank you.” Waverly smiled, stepping inside the bathroom and closing the door. She faced Nicole, “You’ve got a little something.”

Waverly gestured with her hand but Nicole honestly had no idea where she was pointing. She’d cleaned the cake from her face but there was just so much cake. Nicole sighed.

“I’m so sorry, Waverly.” Nicole sat on the edge of the bathtub. She felt like crying.

“It’s OK.” Waverly said softly with a smile. She put the lid of the toilet down and sat. “It’s just cake.”

“But it’s your wedding cake. And if Wynonna wasn’t so stubborn-“

“Then she wouldn’t be the Wynonna we know and love.” Waverly chuckled.

“How can you be so calm about this?”

“Because I had a back up cake made. Doc is bringing it.”

“Because you didn’t trust Wynonna?”

“No. Because things happen. Wynonna is Wynonna but I know that she wouldn’t do anything on purpose to ruin today. I just wanted to have a backup just in case life happened.”

Nicole still didn’t feel any better.

“I’m still sorry, Waverly. I was just… and she’s so damn frustrating and-“

“You should tell her.” Waverly interrupted. Nicole just looked at her. She wasn’t sure what to say. “You still love her, Nicole. I wasn’t sure yesterday, but I can see it in your eyes just now even when you’re so so mad at her. You have to tell her.”

“I know.” Nicole sighed. “I just don’t know where to start.”

"Start anywhere because whatever the outcome, it's gotta be better than this." Waverly looked down at her hands. "And I can't keep lying to her, Nicole."

"I never asked you to."

"You didn't have to." Waverly looked up at Nicole.

"I know." She sighed. "I'll tell her. I promise."


End file.
